|
[August 2nd, 2009 / 2:24pm] |
[warded: private]
Progress. Twice in one day, actually. He said he'd be back for my twentieth and I believe him. Maybe we will all be able to get together for this. I'm sure with James' help, we could get Peter much more easily and before you know it, things will be...well, not great because Marlene isn't here so it won't be the same, but they'll be better than they have been. I've got to talk to Evans about this. And Remus too, if he's awake. He's been dead moody lately. Hopefully this'll cheer him up.
[warded: ms. pinkstone]
If it's alright with you, I'll bring over your ID this morning.
[warded: andromeda]
I need to pop out this morning but I have a big favour to ask when you have a minute.
[warded: lily]
Did you talk to James yet?
Everything has been so subdued this week. You'd think someone had died or something.
|
|
|
|
[July 30th, 2009 / 1:34pm] |
[warded: private]
I saw James' mum the other day. She's so worried about him. She doesn't think Charlus will actually do anything, but I finally got the story on him and James' Dad. They were not happy with each other. I wonder if James has noted that one. I wanted to talk her into going away, but I couldn't be talked into leaving if I was in her position. I'll just have to keep an eye on things.
Speaking of keeping an eye on things...Remus took me by surprise with that one. I didn't expect him to do that. He was so calm and controlled and she was losing it. I know I probably would if it was someone I gave a damn about but those people are in short supply. Of course, then he said he'd deal with it and I had to go find him him...I don't know what happened. No, that's a lie. It was probably Bella. Bitch. She's so not worth it.
Speaking of things that aren't worth it, more and more I wish the stupid prick had died. Maybe then he'd stop hounding me for something neither of us can change. It's childish and it's boring.
[warded: beth & hestia]
Remus is hurt, badly. I need help.
[warded: order]
Miss. Pinkstone is willing to test the passports, I'd like to get her one as soon as possible. It looks like she's going to need it.
[warded: james]
You know, I think I might have a solution.
|
|
|
|
[July 25th, 2009 / 7:20pm] |
We've had a lot of pro-purist discussions lately, haven't we? I remember when I used to be so much more vocal about this stuff than I am now. I'm not sure what's changed. The easy answer is me, from complacency or fear but I've always prided myself on being brave to the point of recklessness, so I'd hate to think that's the reason. Complacency is even worse, because imagine getting used to horrific things so much they don't phase you. It's not a good sign. I'll warn that ahead are my opinions and you can fuck off now if you like, with this warning.
I grew up in a predominantly purist environment, even was one myself before I formed my own opinions as I got old enough to do so but a lot of people I grew up with ended up as Death Eaters. I even have some in the family, including my baby brother and my elder cousin. It's never easy to face people you cared about in combat. This is what the Death Eaters have forced on the children of our generation. I have to wonder if the families who believe Death Eaters uphold traditional values think it was worth losing their children and their siblings and their friends just to see the purism in control of the Wizarding world.
It feels like the world has forgotten how much death and pain this organisation has caused. My brother was a wreck by the time he died last year; a scared and disillusioned child. This is what the Death Eaters did to one of their own. He disappeared, where we were told he was killed by muggles. He wasn't; even Bellatrix admitted that privately. As for Bellatrix herself, after she became a Death Eater, she got so vocal about how great the whole thing was. Family gatherings became slanging matches, which descended into violence. In the end, I had to leave. Traditional values are supposed to be about family. When it comes to my family, it tore us apart.
We created new families, in friends and in the girls' case, marriage but your past is your past and you can't change it because it happened and there are a lot of things that it feels like people have forgotten or dismissed for the illusion of peace. I'm good at denial; I'm a Black, it's in my blood, but I know that I, for one, can't sit by and welcome good changes like taking care of children and so on when I know it's been paid for with the blood and pain of the people and families of our world, no matter who they were.
|
|
|
|
[July 23rd, 2009 / 3:17pm] |
[warded: private]
The guy should be a politician. If I didn't know he was a lying bastard, I might actually be reassured.
I have a headache after yesterday. I was worried sick about James and then it being Regulus' birthday, Hestia saying that and running into Julianne? I'm not surprised I have a headache.
I need a holiday.
|
|
|
|
[July 21st, 2009 / 11:56pm] |
( Warded: James. )
edited, after below:
[warded: order]
Guys, I think I fucked up James.
HELP.
|
|
|
|
[July 20th, 2009 / 8:53pm] |
So I see that on top of sorting out kids that are already born, they're trying to take care of the mothers too.
Wow, if they'd just reinstate the Quidditch and give up the totalitarianism, we'd be set (!)
|
|
|
|
[July 20th, 2009 / 2:23pm] |
[warded: lily]
I spoke to James.
Seeing him is a big no. I was right, the only reason I got in and out was family connections and they're having a fire first, think later policy.
added after this.
[warded: james]
Your wife is not only driving me insane but going to get me killed.
For the love of all things Quidditch, will you please just talk to her?
|
|
|
|
[July 17th, 2009 / 7:51pm] |
( Private. )
[warded: order]
I'm back, I'm unbrainwashed and I made sure I wasn't tracked. I feel like I should win some kind of bet.
James is living, breathing and doesn't sound half as big a twat in person and I owe Remus an 'I told you so' dance, excuse me.
Lovely weather for flying. I'm not even soaked. I could definitely get used to this.
added after this.
[warded: james]
I have a really stupid, ridiculous question to ask you.
|
|
|
|
[July 16th, 2009 / 2:21pm] |
[warded: order]
I am going to see James on Friday. If anyone has anything they want checked other than his physical state, I suggest asking me now.
|
|
|
|
[July 13th, 2009 / 6:57pm] |
[warded: order]
If anyone was wondering if James is faking it, nada.
He cut his hair.
|
|
|
|
[July 8th, 2009 / 8:24pm] |
[warded: private]
In what world is Peter more strong minded than James?
[warded: order]
Did everyone catch Peters post? We aren't all Remus.
|
|
|
|
[July 2nd, 2009 / 8:03pm] |
Warded to: Remus.
Warded to: Order.
Guys, we might have a bad haired problem.
|
|
|
| Private. |
[July 1st, 2009 / 11:44am] |
Marlene....
there are no words anymore.
|
|
|
|
[June 18th, 2009 / 8:21pm] |
[warded: remus]
Going to go commit murder. Want to come?
|
|
|
| Private. |
[June 18th, 2009 / 4:57pm] |
I don't know how this is supposed to work. This life thing. This family thing, in days like this. I could sit and wonder what's happened to my life in the last two years, but there wouldn't be much of a point. It's simple enough. Everything continues to go down hill. I'm waiting on Marlene or Remus or Lily to disappear next. When my brother Regulus disappeared, he never game back. It feels insane that it was seven months ago, now. It is insane. Everything is so messed up and out of control that more people are dying and more people are just disappearing. Half of me wants to tear the place apart and the other half just wants to sit and do nothing, because nothing we do will matter if he doesn't come back. Why would it? My family was tearing itself apart all my life, slowly and now the family I made is falling apart because they're just gone. It's exhausting to keep up hope for this shit.
I don't want to sit here. I don't want to collect my thoughts. I hate the paralysis this is doing to me. I hate what it's doing to what's left of the people I love. We have become complacent except when we're furious and then we make mistakes and then the Order snaps at eachother like whiny bitches. I have a puppy. A bike. A best friend. A family. Why do I feel so fucking miserable? Because people keep leaving and I'm sick of this stifling loneliness.
I'm ready to go home, except it doesn't exist. I'm not sure it ever did. Did I just delude myself? Probably.
I despise this, more than anything. The uncertainty. I want my best friend back. I want my brother back. If I can't have that...what's the use of any of it?
|
|
|
|
[June 15th, 2009 / 5:53pm] |
[warded: prongie]
Any chance I can borrow the cloak today? I have a couple of things I want to test out.
|
|
|
|
[June 10th, 2009 / 5:18pm] |
[warded: mwppml]
Calamitous Chloris wants 'help'. Anyone want to join in my 'what the hell?
|
|
|
|
[May 28th, 2009 / 6:43pm] |
Nice to know what my crazy aunt wears is so newsworthy. I mean, it's not as if I care about marriage, I'm against it for moral reasons but if two people want to get married, it's their business. What's the point in calling it something different? Two people in love and wanting to spend their lives together or two people thinking they'd make okay babies, it doesn't sound much different to me. Why separate the rights? They obviously care enough to pledge themselves. It's just bureaucracy and paper work.
Unless, of course, the point is that you marry down, you marry into lower 'equality', which would be terribly convenient should something untoward occur with your other half. Mostly, it's all just reminding me why I don't dig unions as a concept. People will be with who they want to be with, or should be, despite what restriction anyone imposes on it. I'm pretty sure that's what being in love is supposed to be about. Like I said, bureaucracy and paper. I got no time for it. Why can't they do something more useful than finding new ways to separate the rights of people? All just people.
I'd love to know what 'special care' is. Hopefully, it entails an education into the customs of their partner and doesn't include them, I dunno, getting foisted out on their ear.
|
|
|